Two Times Love Screwed Discord Up and One Time It Didn't
by yuffiehighwind
Summary: Two times love screwed Discord up and one time it didn't. Discord/Deimos.


**Summary:** Three moments in time - Strife's conception, Strife's death, and a snapshot from her 25 years with Deimos.

**Notes:** This is an excerpt from a WIP I'm writing that's posted over on AO3 called "The Opposite of Amnesia." These flashbacks take place during my weird XWP/HtLJ series "An Eternity in Cheese Country," a ludicrous epic in which Discord, Deimos and Strife have been reincarnated in 1998 Wisconsin. While the plot sounds comedic, Discord's backstory includes a very dark relationship with Ares and complicated feelings about Strife's death. Meanwhile, the crack!ship of Discord/Deimos evolves over the course of EiCC into being much healthier, which Discord finds absolutely bonkers.

Like in the original Greek myth, Aphrodite and Ares are the parents of Deimos, even though Deimos is explicitly their cousin in TV canon.

Dialogue with Ares after Strife's death comes from HtLJ S4E16, "Porkules." The scenes with Deimos take place during the time gap between XWP S5E19, "Looking Death in the Eye" and S5E20 "Livia."

Rated M for excessive swearing. Sorry, but there's no sex.

* * *

**Two Times Love Fucked Discord Up and One Time It Didn't**

_**Three Thousand Years Ago**_

"Fuck me up, Bacchus."

"Um—"

Discord stormed into the central hall of Parnassus where the other gods were setting up for a party, and her petite body shook the walls like a five-ton elephant with every step. The war goddess was a 5'4" hurricane who was quite literally dragging rainclouds in her wake, lightning sparking around her frizzed-out black hair. She looked just like her father Zeus, if he were a 20-year-old girl in a black leather dress.

Discord didn't register her cousins' looks of shock and confusion – she had never displayed such power outside a battlefield before – just marched up to the first person with wine and snatched the two jugs they were holding.

"Well hello to you too, sunshine," said a sarcastic female voice behind her.

Discord took a messy gulp of wine, spilling red liquid down her chin, and after a moment, the lightning bolts haloing her hair started to shrink. Closing her eyes in pleasure, she took another sip and the rain from her personal stormcloud stopped falling. Discord took a deep breath and turned around. Her sister Aphrodite, the blonde-haired Goddess of Love, stood with her arms akimbo, eyebrows raised. Discord glared at her.

"Take a walk, sister."

Aphrodite stepped forward, entirely unconcerned for her safety, and snagged one of the jugs from Discord's grasp. She set it down on a nearby table with a silent nod to whoever stood behind Discord –Bacchus or Dionysus, or whatever name he used these days – as if to say, _"I've got this."_

"Tell me what happened."

If Discord could be described as Zeus on an enraged tear, then Aphrodite could be described as Zeus on one of his better days – straight-backed and commanding. The two goddesses had different mothers – Dione was a lovely person, probably, while Discord hero-worshipped her ruthless mother Hera – but they were both clearly their father's daughters. Aphrodite had the unfair advantage of age, and Discord knew not to piss her off. That didn't mean she had to answer her questions.

But Discord didn't have to share what was wrong. Aphrodite was a love goddess and she likely knew already. She didn't even need to read Discord's mind - she could put together all the pieces logically. Discord had been working for, with, and beneath their brother Ares, and the God of War had not been the kindest of men.

Discord shook her head instead of answering, taking another sip of the wine from the jug she had left.

"Ares," said Aphrodite, nodding in understanding. Discord's eyes darted – she couldn't meet her sister's gaze. Aphrodite's sympathetic expression made her uncomfortable. Discord preferred their ferocious combat. _This isn't caring_, she thought. _It's pity._

Discord wiped her red-stained lips with her forearm and muttered, "Yeah, Ares." She waved the wine jug in Aphrodite's face. "So I'm getting drunk."

Aphrodite's lip quirked. It was a party, after all, and she was one of the planners.

"You know what kind of stuff goes down on Mt. Parnassus, right Sis?" she said. "A lot of love, and no fighting allowed."

The goddess pronounced the word "love" like "lurrrve," to differentiate lust from deeper affection. Maybe one or two couples there were in love, but most just wanted to get down and dirty. More importantly, most people there wanted a chill time with no discord.

"Yeah, yeah," Discord grumbled, watching servers bring out two huge platters of golden, glistening ambrosia. The gods could eat anything they wanted, but the only truly satisfying food was this invigorating, immortality-granting treat. And the only booze that could get them drunk was Dionysus' special wine.

Aphrodite gave Discord a tight smile and held out her hand. Discord furrowed her brow, puzzled. Realizing what she wanted, Discord rolled her eyes. She set down the wine and started pulling small knives from every hiding place – from inside her corset, her boots, her bracers – and handed them to Aphrodite. It wasn't like she couldn't conjure new weapons, but if she broke any rules at this party, Zeus would find out, and he'd kick her ass with far more powerful lightning than Discord's own modest sparks.

Aphrodite made a complex gesture with her right hand, which made the knives in her left one disappear. Seeing Discord's scowl about to transform into outrage, Aphrodite said, "Relax, relax, they're over at the weapons check. You can see for yourself." She conjured a little scroll that had a number on it. With a smile, she said, "Here's your ticket."

Discord snapped her fingers and the scroll went up in smoke. Aphrodite said, "Ouch!" and shook her fingers.

"I believe you. Now get out of my way."

Discord pushed Aphrodite aside and approached Hermes, the Messenger God, who had just flown in. She gave him a seductive smile, licked her lips and said sweetly, "Wanna split a drink with me?"

* * *

"You're with child?"

Ares wasn't even angry.

Discord needed him to be more angry.

"Who's the father?" Ares asked, as if word hadn't already reached him Discord slept with every god at the party and there was no way to know.

"I don't know," she said, wondering when he would get jealous.

She needed Ares to be jealous.

Instead, Ares shrugged, his stupid leg casually swung over his stupid throne's armrest, relaxed as a sunning cat.

"Congratulations?"

He said it like a question, perhaps because he wasn't sure Discord wanted to keep the pregnancy. He was acting nice, so fucking nice. He was the God of fucking War, why was he being nice? _(Stop stop stop being so fucking nice!)_

Discord held a serious, neutral expression.

"I'm keeping it," she said flatly.

Ares raised an eyebrow, then gave her a small approving nod.

"Well okay then."

He got up from his throne, towering over her. Ares gently took Discord's chin in his hand, tilting her face up, and she longed for him to kiss her. Instead, he asked, "How long until you're due?"

Gods had different gestation rates than mortals and they could vary depending on circumstance. In one extreme, Athena had been carried by her father, and shot to adulthood so fast she split Zeus' skull. An estimated date could be iffy. It didn't matter anyway, because his real question was if Discord could still do her assignments.

"Well, Discord," he said softly, his face so close she could press their lips if she was just a little taller. "Until you're waddling around like a top-heavy penguin..."

The God of War stepped back, withdrawing his warm touch, and with a grin he clapped his hands together loudly.

"Back to work!"

* * *

_**1,300 Years Later**_

Discord was just about to torch a fishing village when Hermes the Messenger God flew down and landed beside her. She jumped, surprised.

"Land wherever you like," she said sarcastically. "It's not like I'm busy or anything."

Her comments drew no amusement from him. Hermes' expression was grave.

"Discord, I have terrible news."

"What news is so disturbing to the man who delivers bad news so often?"

"Callisto, well—"

"Oh fuck her," Discord said dismissively. The little psycho's reputation preceded her, but Callisto's actions held little consequence in Discord's own life. Discord figured she'd keep it that way and give the firecracker sociopath a wide berth.

"She killed—"

Discord rolled her eyes and Hermes had trouble getting her to focus on his words.

"Discord, this is important! I don't know—I don't know how to tell you this."

Hermes looked shaken and distraught._ (Who did that bitch kill?)_

"She killed Strife."

Discord's first instinct was to hysterically laugh, and the involuntary sound made Hermes' expression grow darker. Suddenly Discord had a flash of ancient memories – kissing the god at a party and taking him into her bed. Having a baby.

Discord's laughter faded and she said, "You're serious."

Hermes took her hand and Discord hoped he couldn't feel it shaking. She snatched it away.

"I'm sorry. It was the—"

"Hind's Blood."

"How did you know?"

_(Serena…)_

"Why the fuck _wouldn't_ I know?" Discord snapped, as if the blood's effects had been common knowledge and not a carefully guarded secret. "I'm his fucking mother! I knew Ares stocked up that shit. What a fucking—"

Discord screamed the word, _"Idiot!"_ and the sonic waves from her shout cracked the earth beneath their feet. Hermes jumped out of the way, hovering on his winged shoes.

Discord fell forward, slamming the ground with her knees and her fists. Sparks of lightning appeared around Discord's teased-out black hair, making it stand on end with static.

She glared up at Hermes. Her eyes welling with tears, she said furiously, "If you tell a single soul that I—"

"I won't," he insisted, frightened by her rage. "I understand. I understand better than you think."

After a beat, Discord said, "I blame all our son's stupider qualities on you, by the way."

Hermes – the god of many more things than just messages, admired by mortals and immortals alike for his shrewd intelligence - rightly looked offended. He probably wasn't Strife's father anyway. The boy more often reminded Discord of Hades, but she couldn't remember if Hades had lain with her too.

"Fuckin' Ares," Discord spat. She stumbled to her feet and Hermes didn't offer his hand. He kept his distance but stopped hovering, now he knew the ground wouldn't open wide to swallow them. They both took deep breaths.

There was a brief, strained silence, then Discord said, "Maybe this is a good thing." Hermes shook his head in disagreement. "No, really. Maybe Strife's better off."

"You don't mean that!"

Discord waved both hands and her personal lightning storm fizzled out. With another snap, Discord straightened her hair and reapplied her streaking makeup.

"Did it happen just now?" she asked.

"No," Hermes said. "It's been a few days."

"Figures," Discord said. "I think you're the only person who thought I'd want to know."

"They assumed you wouldn't care. You haven't been the most…maternal."

"Then I must take after Hera. Where's that cunt Callisto now?"

"There was a battle. She—"

"Never mind, forget it. As long as she paid the price, I don't actually care." After a pause, Discord asked, "How's Ares taking it?"

"Not great."

"Is he alone?"

Hermes nodded. Discord raised her hand to teleport.

"By the way, I want to thank you, Hermes," she said. "For everything."

"You're welcome, Discord." Hermes sighed. "Now what're you gonna do?"

She shrugged.

"Oh, I dunno. Kill Hercules?"

Hermes' eyes widened.

"But he had nothing to do with—!"

Then Discord was gone.

* * *

Discord materialized in Ares' temple, where he sat on his throne smashing statues with small bolts of lightning. His eyes were dark, his handsome features twisted into something between grief and rage.

"Redecorating?" she asked, but Ares didn't acknowledge her. "Still upset about Strife, huh?"

Ares didn't reply, smashing another statue. She honestly couldn't blame him but knew they needed to move on, and soon. A sullen God of War was a dangerous one.

Discord put on her lightest, most careless tone. She shoved her love for Strife in an imaginary steel box, triple-padlocked it, and pushed it way down deep into the vault in the depths of her mind.

"He was a geek with the IQ of a sponge," she said. Matter-of-factly, she added, "Take my word for it, he's better off dead."

The way things were going - the way things had been - Discord hoped that she was right.

Ares appeared to be considering her cold words and the accuracy of her assessment of Strife's intelligence.

"Still," Ares said with a sigh. "He was fun to kick around."

Discord remembered every brutal punch, every slap, every time Ares took out his anger on the boy, and how he'd sometimes just beat him up for fun. Discord shook the disturbing images from her mind.

"I think I may have found a way to cheer you up," she said, thinking of a scheme she had wanted to try for a while now, one that would make her feel a lot better too. Discord needed a distraction even more than her brother did, and this could be a good one.

Ares stood up from his throne and approached her, sarcastically saying, "Oh, let me guess. You hatched a plan to rid the world of my overrated half-brother." Ares sneered. "So, what else is new?"

Discord frowned and thought of all the times Ares had blown her off, while keeping Strife tightly by his side. She summoned up every scrap of dislike for her shitty, dead kid to motivate her next action. It wasn't hard, with Ares looking at her like that. _(Would Ares be this sad and angry if I died too?)_

"Alright, enough's enough," Discord said. "Snap out of it! You're starting to become a real drag!"

Ares replied with a smirk, "Why, Discord, I'd forgotten what a temper you have."

Discord leaned in close, looking up at Ares and batting her eyes flirtatiously.

"I know we haven't been the best of 'friends,' lately," she said, dripping innuendo into the word friend. And it was true - with Strife glued to him, Ares and Discord had not been "friendly" in far too long. _(It probably doesn't help I tried to kill his son Evander.) _"So, why don't you let me make it up to you?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"Why spoil the fun?" she said. "Let me just say that by the end of the day you'll be so 'tickled,'" and she stressed the innuendo in this word too, "you'll want me to be your second-in-command."

Ares scowled. Not good. Had Discord lost him? She'd lost him. Second-in-command was Strife's job and—

"Strife's body's not even cold, yet," Ares said furiously. "You have no shame!"

It felt like a slap, because Ares was right. Discord claiming Strife's spot only days after his death and minutes after news of it? What kind of person did that? (_What kind of mother?)_ Someone who didn't believe in wasting time.

But Ares seemed to respect such a ballsy move, because his angry expression spread into a devious grin.

"And I like your style."

Discord painted on a seductive smile and buried her love for Strife even deeper. After all, this outcome was what she had wanted for fifteen years, wasn't it? After Hercules left the Academy, Ares picked Strife as his second, and she and Strife parted ways. Now Ares would finally be hers again - and hers alone. And she'd be next in line as Goddess of War.

"Oh, baby," Discord cooed. "There's a whole lot more of me to like if you know where to look."

Ares grinned lustfully, eyes roaming up and down her body. Discord had missed that gaze.

"Oh, you know I do." More seriously, Ares commanded, "Go. Impress me."

Discord gladly complied, gleefully stealing their sister Artemis' magic bow and using it to turn Hercules into a pig.

Unfortunately, her plan backfired, and after a series of increasingly ludicrous and improbable events, Discord was turned into a giant chicken, and she thought…

Yeah, Discord probably deserved it for what she'd said.

* * *

_**Twenty Years Later**_

"What in Tartarus is your problem?"

"_My_ problem? What's _my_ problem? What the fuck is _your _problem?"

Discord and Deimos were arguing – as they often did – about something they would surely give less than two shits about later. To them it was currently the most important thing in the world, at least on principle. The argument was tired and old, and mostly came down to stepping on each other's toes while battling various heroes, manipulating royals and their armies, and interacting with Ares and the other gods. Hercules was still around too, as well as his partner Iolaus, although Iolaus was now an old man whose talents he used to train new heroes, rather than going on adventures himself.

It was five years after Zeus and Hera's deaths before Discord felt comfortable attacking Hercules again, since Ares had put an unofficial sort of protection on their brother himself - unspoken but tacitly approved. There were no grand repercussions for killing Hercules anymore, like when Zeus was in charge. But since Ares and Hercules had called a truce, Discord didn't push her luck. She stuck to less deadly schemes, trying to nudge her little half-brother towards evil. It was a fun goal but never quite worked, though it kept her occupied. It kept them both occupied.

Deimos still wanted to be Ares' second-in-command like his late cousin Strife, and so did Discord. After another ten years of mourning Xena – who Athena had driven off a cliff- the God of War finally regained his old self and welcomed the pair back into his Halls. He wouldn't interact with Discord alone, however, and it reminded her of those years when Hercules was at the Academy, Ares giving no extra favor to either Discord or Strife. Commanding them both, like decorated officers or loose pieces of garbage, depending on his mood. Sadly, some things never changed.

Discord supposed she should be grateful Ares considered his sister and his son to be on equal footing – unlike the many years he'd kept Strife close by his side_. (Too fucking close.)_

But this meant Deimos was still her competition, and Discord owed no allegiance to the foolish excuse of a fear god. Strife had been her ditzy son, while Deimos was her trashy nephew. Family ties didn't compel her to side with Deimos. They didn't need to be partners, like she had been with Strife. Why the fuck did they have to cooperate at all, when Discord was perfectly capable of accomplishing tasks herself?

Today Discord wasn't sure what they were even arguing about - probably territory again. They had their own projects that had nothing to do with Ares or Hercules. Mostly Deimos liked scaring humans and Discord liked making them fight - ultimately some shit caught on fire when they couldn't agree who got dibs, and everything they worked for fell apart.

More frequently – _too frequently_ \- they settled their arguments horizontally.

* * *

Fifteen years was a long time in human years for an arrangement like theirs to last, and Discord wasn't sure they'd be living this way had things turned out differently. If Xena hadn't died and Ares never mourned, or if Xena _had _died but Ares didn't give a shit. Discord always rationalized her relationship with Deimos was somehow Ares' fault.

Whenever it was just her and Deimos, not thinking about consequences and just living in the moment - any captured, fleeting moments, because who knew how fucking long things would last before the prophesied Twilight caught up with them – their competition evaporated. Ares didn't fucking matter – nobody did – in the charged space between their bodies and tangled sheets of their bed.

"You're so damn beautiful," Deimos moaned. "I love you so fucking much."

While Discord silently freaked out about Deimos spilling such declarations, a part of her wondered if his sneaky brother Phobos was triggering her anxiety. Nobody in the middle of an orgasm should be so terrified of catching feelings. Deimos was half Aphrodite's, and Aphrodite loved everybody, just a little bit. Of course her son would be a little off, a little weird, a little too much like a human. Like it or not, he and Discord worked together enough to become friends, but just friends. People would say anything while they were coming. Deimos loved Discord like he loved a burning building, a plate of ambrosia, or jug of Dionysus' wine.

"I can't," she blurted stupidly in response, remembering Hera telling her that _war gods don't love, they can't love, they're not remotely capable._

Misinterpreting Discord's statement, Deimos eased himself inside her, reassuringly saying, "Don't you worry, babe, I'm gonna get you there."

* * *

"What are we doing?" Discord asked Deimos in exasperation one day, while they spied on kids from the academy Iolaus had founded to train future fighters, just as he and Hercules had been trained.

"Fucking with Iolaus? I dunno. Didn't you have a specific plan?"

"Yes of course I do," Discord lied, "but I thought maybe, I dunno, you'd want to share your ideas."

Deimos paused, thinking, tongue darting out to lick his upper lip. He picked at his fingernails, the silence stretching longer, and clearly he was unprepared.

"Nyx!" Discord said. "You're lucky I'm not Ares."

"I'm thinking!" he snapped defensively.

"Tick-tock, kid."

"Why do we gotta bother them today? Don't you wanna do some more, I dunno, reconnaissance first?"

Discord shrugged.

"I guess, but it's kinda boring. I mean, like—"

"Or do some brainstorming? 'Cause I was thinking, there's this cove down south I've been wanting to check out."

"Huh?"

"It's gorgeous! It's good for swimming, and drinking, and-and other things."

Discord looked at Deimos like he was crazy.

"What are you saying? That you want to go to the beach?"

Deimos nodded enthusiastically. Discord groaned.

"You are just like your mother."

He scoffed. "We're nothing alike."

Discord waved her arms, gesturing to his entire body.

"The hair, the clothes, the body language, and now the vacation spots."

Deimos bit his lip, his expression a mixture of embarrassment, guilt and uncertainty. Discord sometimes had the strong feeling he wanted to switch sides, but they both knew there was a violent, psychotic undercurrent within him from Ares that made Deimos an equally incompetent love god.

Two big, blue puppy-dog eyes were wearing her resistance thin.

"Ugh!" she said. "Okay, we'll go to your dumb beach for a day."

Deimos clapped his hands and spun in a circle.

"Really? Yay!"

Face in her palm, Discord groaned. "You make it so, _so_ difficult to tolerate you."

"You know you love it."

Discord sighed, saying, "What's the dress code at this place?"

"Hmm, nude, I should say."

"Try again."

"Fine," Deimos said. "Uh, hang on."

He snapped his fingers, and suddenly Discord was wearing something far too similar to Aphrodite's attire than Discord ever hoped to hang on her body.

"NOPE!" she shouted, immediately snapping her own fingers, replacing sickening, lacy pastels with a simpler black cotton dress. It felt cooler and was more appropriate beachwear than her armor but fit her personality.

"Deimos, we really need to have a talk," Discord said, pulling her thick hair back and tying it. "You are literally my worst nightmare. I'm dating my sister, except it's far, far worse."

"We're '_dating?'" _he said, making airquotes and laughing. "But that's a human thing!"

"I have no idea what the fuck it is we're doing," Discord grumbled. "I just know I want you to shut the fuck up and teleport us to this stupid cove already. We'll take a swim, bang out a quickie, and then we're right back here and back to work."

"You sound just like Ares."

"That's kinda the point. Let's go."

* * *

Shading her eyes from the bright afternoon sun, Discord gazed across the water looking for signs of a ship. Deimos – mostly naked, except for skintight swim trunks - sat next to a campfire on the beach behind her, munching on a turkey leg. Discord had not stripped down or even rolled up her dress. She stepped into the water to cool her feet, and the black fabric twisted around her ankles, soaked with seawater.

"What're you doin'?"

"Looking for humans."

"The whole point of this trip was to get away from humans."

_And be alone together, _he didn't say.

"I'm bored."

Discord thought she spotted something in the waves, perhaps the head of a mermaid like Nautica. Then again, she shouldn't push her luck and mess with Triton again.

"You wouldn't want to sink a ship?" she asked him. "Could be fun."

"You know Poseidon would have a shitfit," Deimos replied. "Did you not want to have sex? We can just eat instead." He waved the turkey leg at her. "Come on, try some. It's delicious!"

Discord gave him an unimpressed look. They had divine powers and the ability to conjure anything, and Deimos had put together a basic picnic spread – pieces of roast turkey, some grapes, slices of cheese and a jug of wine.

"Please tell me you hid some ambrosia in there," she said, gesturing to an actual fuckin' picnic basket.

"You think I'm stupid? Voila!" Deimos pulled out a smaller bundle, peeled back the fabric and revealed the amber treat.

Discord reached down for it, but Deimos yanked it from her reach. Discord took the hint and sat beside him, sand sticking to her damp cotton dress. Deimos pinched off a piece and held it up to her lips.

"Say 'ah.'"

"I'm gonna kill you," Discord muttered, before obediently opening her mouth. He placed the ambrosia on her tongue.

"Mmm," she said. Her moan bordered on erotic, which was entirely unintentional. Discord blushed.

"No need to be embarrassed," Deimos said. "Want more?"

Discord nodded, eagerly swallowing another piece.

"Now that's good," she said.

Deimos had been saving the ambrosia for dessert, but the two gods polished it off quickly. The flavor was difficult to describe – like every deliciously bad-for-you food rolled into one gooey package. Salty and sugary and savory all at once.

Another reason Discord's eyes kept scanning the ocean was she wanted to be certain she and Deimos were alone.

True, they could just turn invisible, but another immortal may still spot them. Keyed up from the ambrosia, Discord let the anxiety go. She pushed Deimos into the sand and straddled him.

As she leaned down for a kiss, he said, "Wait, wait."

"What is it?"

"Sand. There's too much sand. It's coarse and rough and it's getting fuckin' everywhere!"

"Oh," said Discord. With a slight smile, she blinked and they were suddenly nude and clean, laying on a large, soft blanket. "Better?"

"Yeah," he said. "Much better."

When you were gods, beach sex could be fun. It was easy to clean off the salt spray and sand, spread out on conjured blankets that would never get dirty, and enjoy a partner's body in the cool breeze and shining sun. Discord was used to fucking Deimos in dark, hidden corners of temples and hideouts, so often afraid of being caught that she'd forgotten how fun it was banging outside.

"Thank you," she said afterwards, clothed again in her now-dry black dress, wearing dark glasses to dim the light. Deimos lay beside her on his back, still nude, hands behind his head.

"For what?"

"For bringing me here. I forgot how much I liked the outdoors."

Deimos snorted.

"You like the outdoors?"

"Why is that so surprising?"

Deimos sat up, poked her shoulder and said, "Because you're always slinking through the shadows like an alley cat." He mimed a cat walking with his fingers. "I thought you'd catch fire in the sun, you're so pale." He lightly ran his fingers down her arm. "Lucky you don't burn."

"Lucky you haven't set me on fire yet."

Deimos removed her glasses from her face and tossed them aside. Discord grabbed for them, but Deimos pushed her back down.

"Babe, I set you on fire every night."

"How do you know I'm not faking it?"

"Hmm, I suppose there's no way to really know," Deimos admitted, which was mature of him. "Except I kinda have this ability I picked up from—"

"Don't finish that sentence."

"Might explain a lot of weird things, actually."

"Ya think?"

Discord sat up. She kissed Deimos' cheek, then got to her feet.

"The very implication that you fuck like your mom is making me so dry, I may never get wet again."

Deimos laughed.

"Come on, let's go."

"But we didn't even swim!"

Discord frowned. She didn't want to swim, mostly because she wasn't sure what footing she was on with Poseidon.

Deimos made the decision for her, picking Discord up over his shoulder and carrying her into the sea.

"Put me down!" she yelled, and though she could easily wreck him, they were already in the water and she didn't bother.

The water was shallow, and Discord could stand up easily – it was only slightly deeper than where she'd stood earlier. Deimos swam further out, until he was in deep enough water to pick his legs up and float.

"Come on, Discord," he hollered, gesturing for her to join him. Discord sighed in exasperation, then succumbed to the idiot's goofy grin and removed her dress. She stripped by hand, pulling it over her head, and discarded the drenched fabric in the water to float away like a flattened corpse. Discord dove into the water and swam to Deimos' side. When she resurfaced, he splashed her face playfully, starting a fight he was certain to lose.

* * *

"Are you ready to get back to work?" Discord asked. After their swim, they ate more food and had more sex - the day growing long as the sun set.

"Tomorrow," Deimos said. "We're gonna fuck up Iolaus' academy."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, we're gonna—and it's gonna—"

"What?"

"It's gonna be cool. Give me a little more time to think of something cool."

Discord hummed softly.

"Oh, honey," she said. "We've got all the time in eternity."


End file.
